edit: it is now currently 6am the next morning and i haven’t been to sleep yet so i thought i’d finish up this post to share with all of you. enjoy.
I am currently waiting for my boyfriend to head off to the studio so I can finally sit down and actually record the first episode of my new podcast Spiritual Tea. It feels like I’ve been talking about this for so long that the words “spiritual”, “tea” and “podcast” has almost lost all meaning to me. But I’ve got my notes and I’m going to make myself a yummy cup of green tea, so I’m ready.
Ya know, I’m constantly being told (mostly by the “baby boomers”) that I must not be working hard enough, doing enough, or sometimes I’m accused of not working at all because I don’t have a traditional 9-5 like they did when they were my age. Working from home, creating a business (I’m talking about my Etsy) and actually lovin what you do is still seen as “not real work”. How could you possibly be working hard if you’re not completely miserable and unhappy like I was?
I’m not sure if this is everyone’s experience but I’ve come to realize, in my life at least, no one is ever going to take me seriously when it comes to working. It’s either:
- “You’re not making as much money as I would like to make, therefore you must be doing something wrong.”
- “If you don’t have to leave your house to go to work then you’re not working.”
- “Working is when you get a paycheck every week with your name on it.”
- “If you’re not doing it my way, then you’re doing it the wrong way.”
Okay, so maybe I made these statements a little more… generic… but you get the point. So, um, why are you telling me this Sarah? Well, my little star baby, it’s because I want you to know that people like this do not define your worth. So let’s “debunk” these right now.
- Their dream is not your dream. So you’re family or friends aspire to be millionaires. That’s awesome! But…. you do not need to aspire this as well. This may come as a shock to some of you but it’s not about money, money, money for everyone. If you’ve found yourself in a place of “I’d just like to be comfortable” and for you comfortable is a small house in the woods, a studio apartment in the city or living in a van on the road 24/7 that’s okay.
- Okay, times have changed. We have the internet, cellphones…. Twitter. I mean people are literally making money running Twitter and Instagram accounts. Working from home is no longer the unachievable, more and more people are desiring this option everyday.
- This is that “mob mentality” way of thinking. We’ve been brainwashed to believe that we’re only as worthy as the numbers printed on a piece of paper. It’s been drilled into our heads that a “normal job” is one where you sit in traffic for aN hour, sit at a desk for 8 hours and come home to sit on the couch for 4 hours. Then every 2 weeks you get a little piece of paper with the amount of money someone thought your time, effort and hard work was worth. Don’t even get me started on “the man”.
- The last one is the one I hear the most often. I didn’t achieve my goals in a way that someone else would have, therefore I must be wrong. I don’t live my life the way someone else does, therefore I must be wrong. I don’t have the same dreams of big houses, fancy cars and design clothes (which I guess some people think this is what everyone wants) therefore I must be wrong.
My brother once told me “if it’s not going to make you a million dollars someday, then it’s not worth it.” He was referring to my Etsy shop. I was talking to him about my goals for the shop and new designs I’d be launching soon but admittedly I was complain a little about how much work I put into it and how I wish I was seeing a little more kickback. I should have known that he would suggest not pursuing if I wasn’t going to be making myself rich from it.
Than there’s friends (who are more like family) who are always trying to suggest ways for me to “improve” my shop. They’ll tell me about some new fad or trend that everyone is into and then insist that if I sell these things I’ll make more money. They are ALWAYS suggesting I design things that don’t fit my brand because they think it’s cute or they would like it.
And in the end when I don’t take their advice I get the “I must not want it bad enough” speech. “It” being success and “success” actually meaning lots of money.
You can’t please everyone. It is not your job to be someone else’s version of success. It’s about what you define as success. If success to you is living in a studio apartment, in the city and living off the income from making clay figurines of creepy baby monsters then be the best creepy baby monster figurine maker you can be!